BREAKING: PLANT APP MAKES MY PLANTS HEALTHY AND NOW MY HOUSE IS COMPLETELY FULL OF FLIES!
Who’d have thought? Dumping beer and yogurt into buckets of dirt all around my house? Incredible!
THIS WEDNESDAY, 3/11, IS 311 DAY! JOIN ME, CHAZ PINKLE, AS I LISTEN TO 311 ALL DAY LONG!
That’s right! From 12:00am to 11:59pm, with no breaks, uninterrupted and alone in my house! I’m talkin’ B-sides, rare tracks, audio interviews, unforgettable live performances on CD-r and of course, all the hits!
FUNNY T-SHIRTS: WEAR YOUR OUTLOOK TOWARD LIFE AND CURRENT SITUATION
Did you know - Funny graphic T-Shirt designs and slogan T-Shirts can serve as a succinct expression of your personality and become a conversation catalyst? Do you like all those big words?
HERE’S A ‘WOKE’ STORY YOU’LL LOVE!
Despite what some would have you believe; the de-gendering of Potatohead was NOT a ‘woke’ overreaction but was actually a corrective to a decades long injustice.
PASSIONATE, FOUL-MOUTHED XENOPHOBE SHOWS UP TO WRONG RALLY
“Fck Krangs!, you know what I’m sayin’?” cried vulgar, anti-alien rallygoer Spreng Geffel while attending a local No Kings rally in her neighborhood last week.
NO KINGS!
Not sure if you guys are going tomorrow but I thought I’d let you know - when Donald J Trump (him) have sees a ‘No Kings!’ that is so loud, everything will be different.
EVEN WHEN WE LOSE, WE WIN. THE AMAZING, TRUE STORY OF THE VOLLEYBALLERS.
Passion, rap, volleyball. On the international and Olympic level, there is only one team who stands out for the masterful interweaving of these three things. The Volleyballers.
BREAKING NEWS: I'M GET TATTOOS AND CRAM SALAD IN MY MOUTH!!!!!!!
ATTENTION!: I’m have GO TO TATTOOS PUT ON MY SKIN! It has ONLY HURT some LITTLE BIT! THIS IS OK! STOP WORRYING ABOUT ME! THIS TATTOOS ARE WORTH IT!
SATAN UNLEASHES AVERAGE BOY BAND ON WORLD
The story of the RealBoys begins just like you knew it would: with a contest between Satan and Lin Manuel Miranda to see who could put together the most ‘just ok’ boy band ever.
GUESS WHAT? EVERYTHING YOU LIKE SUCKS.
Just in case you didn’t know, this story will be happy to confirm what you may have long expected. Too bad for you.
THIS IS A STORY OF TWO SMELLS
A tale of stinks both offensive and humiliating, safe to read about, punishing to experience.
PLUGGED IN. TURNED UP. TURNED OUT. BUGAA IS THERE.
The man now known as BUGAA woke one morning in the intensive care unit of Can Misses Hospital on the island of Ibiza with no memory and would eventually become the greatest DJ the world had ever seen.
COME TO ITALIA! YOU CAN “PUT YOUR HAIR WITH MEATBALLS!”
Hello my friends! Welcome to Italia! That is my name! I am your tour guide! You have heard many things about my country, and I am your tour guide! My name is Antonio Flebetze and I am here to welcome you to my tour guide, Italia!
ELMO LAUNCHES STING-NET!
Cuddly animal-monster ELMO have LAUNCH STING-NET at you! And NOW YOU ARE CAUGHT and IT STINGS!
FAST AND DELICIOUS, ALL KINDA PEOPLE LOVE SANDWICHES
“Yum!” That’s the sound of a sandwich. You know; ham, turkey, they’ve got it all with sandwiches! Bread. Everywhere you go, everywhere I’ve ever been, you can ask all people, and they will all say, “Sandwiches!” I guarantee.
STARBUCKS RELEASES PUMPKIN SPICE OFFERINGS EARLIER THAN EVER GIVING OVERWHELMED NATION SOMETHING NEW TO BITCH ABOUT
Starbucks releases Pumpkin Spice Latte’s in August, just in time for Summer! A grateful nation complains.
SOUND TRANSIT LAUNCHES BOLD NEW AD CAMPAIGN TO BOOST FLAGGING RIDERSHIP
Seattle based Sound Transit has unveiled a new take on their advertisements which seek to highlight the realities of getting from point A to point B across the Puget Sound region.
TOP 10 ROOKIE MOVES WE’VE LOVED TO SEE!
Everybody makes mistakes, especially you. Here are the top 10 rookie moves that we’ve seen you bang out that really inspired us!
OH SHIT! MONKEY VERSUS LIZARD, MONKEY VERSUS LIZARD!!!!
Bang! Smoosh! Kabram!!!! GRAF! Clonks! Fire! Fire! AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! Monkey versus Lizard, Monkey versus Lizard!
GOLFING TOILET MAGAZINE NAMES TOILET WOODS 2024’S BEST GOLFING TOILET
The July issue of Golfing Toilet magazine is out and has proclaimed renowned golfing toilet, Toilet Woods, as its best golfing toilet of 2024.